To swipe or not to swipe, that is the question. Four letters, one word, all this is promised by simply swiping the touch screen of your mobile phone. A dating network praised as a revolution called Tinder, was invented in 2012 to connect mutually interested users by demonstrating that personal branding has reached a new era.
One century ago, values and standards were very different compared to that of today’s technological generation. A lady would have left a handkerchief, hoping a man would approach her as her hero, when bringing the lost property. In 2016, women wait in a bar all night, staring at the object of desire to come over to say hello, usually without success. Can love still be found at such hectic times in a society where normal means to meet all possible demands online, shopping on the go via smartphone? Face to face conversations are replaced by sharing a life event on Facebook and the pictures of your last summer holiday is just fodder for Instagram. Quality time seems to be overrated as five parties need to be fitted into one night, to ensure not to miss out. Official commitment is not sought after anymore, since too many other options are constantly available. Giving up is too easy nowadays, a possibility to start over can be found within seconds of liking a stranger’s picture.
Chatting with a total stranger is an experience. An experience that may seem exciting to begin with but nothing compared to the feeling when you see the smile of the person that entered your life out of the blue in a real life situation. A person that swept you off the feet, a person that made your heart beat faster, a person that took your breath away. The timing could usually not be worse, but it does not matter because falling in love is a mystery that makes life more beautiful. These are the moments that cross someone’s mind like the sudden appearance of thunder and lightning before going to bed or when seeing others happy.
People fall in love with the whole package. A single feature seen on screen can be nice for a moment but the feeling will fade. Disney might have promoted the wrong picture of love: it is human that people may make mistakes but true love always finds its way to last, whereas a dating app like Tinder can only visualise a one-dimensional side to someone’s character. There is no button to feel someone’s touch, hear someone’s laugh or look into each other’s eyes – yet. ‘Tinder’ acquaintances cannot compete. These connections would not call to arrange a date; it would be a too much investment, even too personal. The virtual contact is just a match in an endless collection of liked pictures.
It seems like a never ending game of copying and pasting the same content and waiting for the most interesting answer to pop up. A dating app, well known as a platform that easily lets you find a fling, although technically it is only the first stage of meeting someone new, could still be the chance to find your one true love. In real life, not many matches consider the idea of becoming a couple after exchanging a few messages or even dates – the pool of possibilities is too intriguing. The odds of finding the right person are very limited as you might have swiped in the wrong direction by accident just from having wet fingers from washing the dishes. Competitors like ‘Happen’, ‘Once’ or ‘Bumble’ promise to find true happiness with more customised concrete matches, for instance users that crossed someone’s way in real life. In the end, it could be someone from your last run in the park but you did not notice or were too shy to say “hi”. Bravery is always rewarded, even if the approach seems boring, it is better than regretting having walked away. The power of accepting rejection can lead to more choices with a surprising impact on life.
The secret is: no digital innovation has revealed how to programme a heart yet. Beyond doubt, visual chemistry might be enough for a Saturday night, but fun alone doesn’t make it worth fighting for.
An app like ‘Tinder’ can certainly help extend your personal network and can potentially build the base for the beginning of a relationship. However, sometimes it might be worth switching off the phone and have a little faith. We meet millions of people in life and a billion swipes per day prove that it is easy to match based on attraction with someone we might share a band or hobby with. In fact, there are only a limited number of special people (maybe sitting next to you on the same bus) that can trigger something in you which could scare you to admit that all you need is love.
Words: Natalie Tack
Tags: #trends #love #global #lifestyle